Princess Protection Program I

Princess Protection Program

I I cant remember a scene where they actually eat Q: Mmm-hmmm. That could cover the food thing, maybe. But water? A: rage sustains them. Rage can be very powerful, you know. Q: Mmm-hmmm. And yet for some reason, with all their towering rage, they dont attack each other. Only uninfected humans, and by implication, rats. A:, well, that must be another effect of the Q: Well that is just one amazing virus. And has this one striking drawback, in that it makes those infected allergic to sunlight. At least I assume it does, as you no doubt noticed that the standard zombie movie convention on this issue was followed, in which the, only active at night, or in shaded places. A: Wait, infected guy the soldiers kept on a was active in the daylight. Q: why didnt all the other , the hell Princess Protection Program it, Im gonna call em didnt all Princess Protection Program other zombies come out and hunt in the daytime? A: Yeah, that is pretty Q: So far-fetched that it could easily ruin your enjoyment of what clearly could have been a really good movie, yes? Q: But fear not, Have A Theory. A theory that can explain all this, and more. Would you like to hear my theory? A:, obviously. After all, were only pretending to be two different people Q: Hush up about that! Ok now, my theory is that the researchers were actually working makers! Yes thats right. Film makers who wanted to make the Ultimate Zombie Movie. And I do mean ultimate. None of this tedious mucking about with special effects for them. They were determined to make actual zombies. So they hired those researchers to create the perfect zombie virus. Call it Zombiecycline A: And then Something Went Horribly Wrong? Q: Yes! it? Cue Sinister Sounding Music Perhaps the Zombiecycline was meant to get loose the way it did, right at the same time a stupidifying agent was released into the air. A: A stupidifying agent? Hey, why am I asking the questions now? Q: Hush up! Yes, a stupidifying agent, developed by the same researchers. It was much more contagious than the zombie stuff, it could be passed through the air like the common cold. A: Let me stupidifying agent explains certain boneheaded actions taken by the non-zombie characters? Q: Yes, exactly. Were on the same page now, I see. A: Well duh. Like I said, were really the same Q: Hush I said! Yes, the stupidifying agent explains such things as: Blithely walking into buildings that might have zombies in them, like that inexplicably unlooted supermarket, even though showing it in a looted state might have at least partly explained where the zombies were getting food and water from. A: Perhaps the characters could hear the lighthearted music that was being played in that scene and thats how they knew they wouldnt get attacked in there. Q: Perhaps. But it doesnt explain: Jim walking into that building at the truck stop, just cuz Princess Protection Program in a broody mood or something, where he does get attacked but not infected. Camping out in an exposed place at night and not even that I could see setting anyone to stand watch.